Portae

I didn't mean to say goodbye;
I was only leaving for a while.
Yet when I closed the door behind me,
I closed that door forever.

Goodbye darling, I'll see you later.
But it was later than I knew.
Later turned at last to never,
Farewell final by decree.

South returning for a while,
My heart was light, for I'd be back.
Now every day without her smile
It grows more leaden in my chest.

When will I learn to love completely?
When will I learn that love comes first?
I seek after wisdom of the heart,
But all I've learned is the fear of doors.

—San Diego
7/23/2001 (a.d. X Kal. Aug. 2754)